Its so cold

In class, we do a cold task to find out what we already know. Our cold task was on narrative writing. This is a snapshot of what I can do in 30 minutes by myself.

We are learning to self-assess our writing so we know what we are good at and what we need to work on.

What I want to in prove in my work is to use better punctuation and to show not tell.

Name: Calaya

It was the holidays, I and my cousin were messaging each other. 

I decided it was a good idea to go pick her up on the quad and my sister. When we arrived at her house she said “ill get my quad we’ll have a race “I agreed.

 So she asked if my sister wanted to hop on her with her and if her sister will hop on with me. We were riding up and down her road until she tried to do sideways on it. We were already halfway to her house until my cousin looked back and saw they had flipped. 

I rushed back to them, we were freaked out. My cousin and sister were under the bike, that wasn't a good moment.  At that point, the man living on the corner had seen everything. He came running out and pushed the bike up from them. My cousin that was under the bike said 

“go get my dad please”

I quickly rushed to get her dad,  my uncle. He was there in no time. He was mad. I followed him back up to them on the bike. By the time I got to them, they were alright. My cousin got taken to the hospital a few minutes after.

She was crying that she might have broken her arm, sure enough, she did. Later that day I went home to see if my sister was alright. She had a big hole in her elbow, it was disgusting. My nan took her to the doctor to wrap her arm 

A few months later I went to visit her asking if she was allowed to come but it was, of course, a no. Since that day my cousins aren't allowed to ride or hop on a bike with us ever again. But that's a memory from their scars they say.